It was Ralph Waldo Emerson who was credited with identifying that the secret of success was to “build a better mousetrap and the world will beat a path to your door.”

We thought of that well-known quote as we read a report to Boston Borough Council’s Environment and Performance Committee by a working group asked to look at options in taking forward economic development in the borough.

If you already have that tingling sense of déjà vu, that’s because this sort of stuff is long familiar in that every so often, Boston decides to try to pick itself up, dust itself off and start all over again.

Sadly, this is about as far as it ever gets, since the lure of a comfy armchair at the familiar fireside is enough rapidly to persuade the great and good of our town that things probably aren’t as bad as they seem, and that a better mousetrap isn‘t needed after all.

The problem is that things are as bad as they seem – but the  G&G’s absence of spirit and enthusiasm has come to epitomise the way things are in our corner of the world.

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The words of the report are dismally familiar.

It identifies four “targets” which students of the Worst Street process could chant in their sleep.

To protect and enhance the current retail area.

To encourage business development and innovation

To embrace links to the wider UK, and the world beyond

To develop housing and business spaces.

From the outset, the report acknowledges that failure is the most likely outcome – acknowledging that there are “external factors and forces” which can hamper and affect the success of any initiatives led by either the private retail sector or by the borough council.

These include things such as geographic location (we’re an island in the Sea of Nowhere, so why would anyone come here?) “Local demographics” (we’re not prosperous and therefore not worth investing in;) and “rail and road networks and related infrastructure” (back to the Sea of Nowhere.)

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So what about answers?

“The High Street/Town Centre needs to re-invent its purpose/role. Councils and the private sector require to respond to the needs and demands of the customer, consumer, and community and have a creative and flexible approach to the future role of town centres.

“Rather than being purely retail centres, they will require to become what might be better thought about as destinations in their own right, where people wish to meet, spend time, browse, relax, be housed, enjoy events, history and heritage, eat, drink and shop.”

Sound great – but belay the drinking, don’t forget.

In answer to the question “what have we already done and are we doing?” the report rounds up all the usual suspects:-

The refurbishment of the Market Place … enabling opportunities for more ‘cafe culture’, outside events, craft markets and arts projects – including, if not completely comprising a vintage market, the money-wasting Transported Arts, a buskers day, Boston Bikers night, fun Fridays for children, Boston Mayfair (sic) and the forthcoming Christmas lights switch on.

Forgive us if we don’t writhe in ecstasy at this list of some of the most mundane and obvious activities – and not very many of them either.

Another claim – that the council “enables” the Saturday and Wednesday traditional charter market as well as the Bargate Green Market and a Farmers Market – is an insult to our intelligence.

The spectacularly fruitless English Heritage grant scheme – recently respun as being so successful that it has been extended (!) – which has given away a fraction of the funds available.

The Britain in Bloom project “ensures that the town centre sees some lasting improvements” whilst a bid to the lottery fund is after money for improved signs.

Worst Street also has a minor part in a Water Space Study – playing third fiddle to Lincolnshire County Council and the Environment Agency in the hope of cashing in once the opportunities afforded to the town by the implementation of the Boston Tidal Barrier is completed to “further add strength to Boston as an attractive destination.”

Another plan is to support Boston Stump’s bid for lottery cash “for major project funding, to secure its long term sustainability and future as Boston’s major visitor attraction, destination and historic place.”

Call us old-fashioned, but we remember the days when it was a place of worship.

And the grasping at straws continues with a brief trumpet of the Boston Enterprise Centre – which famously, in the six years since the borough council opened it has made barely a penny in profit.

It also appears that we are forking out £35,000 over five years for a part-time “network development” officer shared with Sleaford, and we believe, not based locally.

  

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When it comes to “Embracing links to the wider UK, and the world beyond” again we hear  the boast of working closely with the Lincolnshire Chamber in the creation of the Boston Visitor Economy Partnership as well as commissioning the Chamber to develop a Destination Management Plan for Boston with all stakeholders.

This was completed this year and so far embraces the “development of a sustainable business membership base to generate resource to deliver activity for the benefit of the area, the creation and distribution of an annual visitor guide, and an enhanced pedestrian way finding and historical interpretation signage scheme for Boston.

Be still, our beating heart.

But it doesn’t end there – although by now, you might wish that it did.

Promotional  “opportunities” include  advertising in Primary Times, a publication for  families with children of primary school age, the RAF Digby magazine Digby Digest, Coach Tours magazine, which is issued to bus companies, and  The American magazine – but which one is anyone’s guess.

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Yet despite the fact that Boston seems to be going nowhere, the report boasts that between 1^st April and 30^th September 2014, permission was given for for 332 housing units and in total there are more than 2,000 new homes on the way.

All this housing in an area where 40% of the population depends on low paid work in the food economy.

Ironically – given the disinterest in the prospect for advancement of the “native” inhabitants, the report notes “our population profile has been of growth largely prompted by young, economic migrants.

“It is probably the case that a significant number of these are well qualified and capable for work types over and beyond what they currently undertake.

“Is this untapped potential with the means to up-skill and address some of the low aspiration issues of the area a big future opportunity?”

We suppose that this suggestion should have been expected – after all, our local political top brass are famous for their enthusiasm for people born and bred in the town to spend their lives in the pack houses without any hope of advancement – unless they take their skills and talents elsewhere, and away from the area.

***

 This report is yet another missed opportunity to try to start moving forward.

It is – as usual – the same tired potpourri of buzzwords and catchphrases like partnerships, networks, teams, projects and stakeholders.

The sad fact is that Boston’s history in recent years is littered with failures to deliver – most of which are highlighted in a laudatory ways in the report.

The Market Place “refurbishment” heads this list of costly blunders – incomplete, bodged … then patched over to try to make the best of a bad job.

The activities that have been staged in this dreary mausoleum number a handful of lacklustre events … which are so devoid of imagination that Worst Street is forced to drag in events which have long preceded any so-called “improvements” – the weekly markets, the May Fair, the Bargate Green Market and the Farmers’ Market – which must rate as one of the feeblest in Lincolnshire.

Building on the ruins of history creates foundations which are crumbling before they are even tested.

What Boston needs is a Big Bang of imagination that will redefine our local universe instead of the damp squib that the council has delivered.

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Oddly, we find ourselves in something of a dichotomy by suggesting that the Boston Big Local £1 million grant might play a role in all this.

Granted, the cash must not be used for things which are the responsibility of the existing authorities, but with so much that needs doing, we would have thought that ring-fenced cash could play a role in an overall scheme of ideas that would really invigorate Boston.

Surely, anything is better that the miserly old Scrooges at Worst Street giving their dwindling pot of tepid, tasteless gruel one last stir in the name of progress.

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Another question that needs answering is that if the English Heritage scheme for improving listed buildings in the town centre is such a roaring success, why is it that  the Boston Conservation Area has   a regular listing on the organisation’s Heritage at Risk Register?

 Year in, year out, the area appears – but does anyone ever seem to bother to take any action?

Of course not.

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As all this is going on, we note plans for a branch of Lidl in Boston – which will unquestionably be trumpeted as a turning point for the town that will “put it on the map.”

And whilst any new big business name is welcome – at the end of the day this is just another cheap food store whose presence will further homogenise the appearance of the town that make it indistinguishable from the rest.

Boston must try harder and do better.

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The poor report mentioned  above underlines how weak our local authority has become, and it may well be that soon we will be seeing changes that will redraw the map of local services.

Lincolnshire's Chief Constable has already warned of a question mark against the future of the county force if more government cuts are imposed. Neil Rhodes told county councillors that budget reductions of £7million were forecast by 2016/7 and £11m by 2017/8, and said that if the cuts were imposed, Lincolnshire Police would be on the brink of going out of business.

Meanwhile, the great and the good at County Hall are becoming increasingly bullish about the idea of a single authority for Lincolnshire and the abolition of the county’s seven district councils.

As the need for economies continues unabated, it seems likely that such a solution might well become irresistible – or at least that we will see the merger of a number of smaller councils.

Boston is a minnow in terms of its budget – and the bulk of its income goes towards paying its wages bill – most of which is spent gathering council tax for head office in Lincoln.

Not only that, as our leaders consistently prove they are unable to organise a booze-up in a brewery, and  as such ill-deserve to continue in office.

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Talk of the police reminds us of an incident the other day as we drove out of town on Spilsby Road.

A car was parked on double yellow lines, on an almost blind curve, causing traffic to queue back towards the town centre.

Getting past was extremely difficult due to the volume on inbound traffic, and many minutes passed by before we were able to start moving.

Ahead of us was a car prominently marked as being owned by the PCSOs, and indeed there were a pair of them inside pounding their beat in warmth and comfort.

A few years ago, we might have expected the police vehicle to pull in front on the illegally parked car and seek out the driver to ask him to move it.

But that was then, and this is now, so it was with no surprise that we saw them pass the offending vehicle and continue on their way – doubtless to an interesting coffee morning somewhere.

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It seems that so desperate is Boston Borough Council for some sort of public response that it has taken to bribing the customers.

A reader recently received a survey through the post – reply paid, of course – with the glittering offer of some sort of membership of the Moulder Leisure Centre – which is worth a few quid even at its entry level.

The idea was that you completed the questionnaire; posted it back and your reply went into a draw.

Sounds good, doesn’t it?

But as our reader approaches his ninth decade, it did cross his mind that a prize of a less specific and more prosaic nature might have been more suitable!

***

Last week we mentioned the achingly slow arrival of candidates to fight next year’s parliamentary election in Boston – likening it to a long running soap opera.

Now another cast member has joined Eastfenders to stand as a Lincolnshire Independent candidate for Boston and Skegness next May.

Lyn Luxton was previously a “grassroots Conservative candidate” who planned to stand but was not selected for the open primary.
Last night, of course our local UKIPpers were meeting in secret to select their candidate, and in the run up to the event, some odd  rumblings were being detected.
Assuming that the result is announced fairly promptly, we will update today's blog later.
Watch this space, as they say ...

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After all these years, it seems that Boston Borough Council is still capable of springing the odd surprise or two.

It’s just been announced that a large proportion of rubbish which is illegally fly-tipped in Boston borough would have been taken away for nothing by our (cliché alert) “local friendly binmen.”

Apparently if  your wheelie bin is full the council will take away what it terms “side waste” – a reasonable amount of excess rubbish that is neither recyclable nor garden waste which cannot fit into your green bin because it is full.

All those people we have asked were unaware of this until now – and although it is presented as a long standing policy, it sounds more of a knee jerk reaction to reduce tipping.

What we need now is for a reduction in the cost of removing bulky waste – £25 for a “standard white item” seems to us  to be a little over the top.

***

“Boston Labour Councillors” as they style themselves – rather than more sensibly using individual names in the run up to the local elections – are flogging the idea of a walk-in clinic in the town to ease pressure on GPs and the town's Accident and Emergency Department.

The group says: “We are told that there are not enough doctors available and we are also told that the A&E department at Pilgrim Hospital is always full as people are using it as an alternative when they wish to see a doctor but can’t get an appointment.”

They want a walk in clinic at Pilgrim Hospital “so our Accident & Emergency department can be just that – for accidents and emergencies and not be crowded with walk in patients who could be treated by a GP or nurse. We believe this will reduce the health pressures that are facing our communities.”

We would not be so cynical as to dismiss this as a purely political stunt  but – hands on hearts, now – is there anyone out there who genuinely believes that this would solve the problem?

All that would happen is that the walk-in clinics would become as log jammed as our surgeries and A&E department, and the problem – instead of abating, would create even more pressure.

***

Try as we might, it seems impossible to separate Boston from flooding.

A report in a national Sunday newspaper at the weekend listed the town as Number 1 on the list of the UK’s most flood-prone towns, with 7,550 homes at “significant flood risk.”

The Sunday Times said that the government is to impose a “levy” on householders, averaging £10.50 a year, to subsidise the home insurance costs of people living in flood-prone areas.

“The money will be added to the cost of home insurance, adding 2.2% to all premiums. That means people with the most expensive policies will pay more of the “tax”, which is designed to raise £180m a year …”

“ …The money will be collected from insurers by Flood Re, a body which is being set up by the Association of British Insurers and will be used to underwrite policies on up to 500,000 homes in areas which are at such high risk of flooding that they might otherwise be uninsurable, such as the Somerset Levels, Boston in Lincolnshire, and along the Thames and Severn.”

We wish that once and for all the authorities would come clean on the flooding issue.

The Environment Agency designates flood risk areas using maps which disregard the existence of any defences.

Whilst Boston has suffered flooding recently, it has escaped some of the worst effects suffered in other areas.

Last December’s episode – billed as the worst tidal surge for sixty years – saw 590 homes and 105 businesses flooded in Boston.

We would hope that soon it should be possible to take a forward looking view of things and be positive rather than negative.

It is claimed that the proposed Boston Barrier will make the town a much safer place to live in and protect us from the excesses of the tides.

Having said that, we wonder why the Environment Agency continued with its bad news policy by displaying a computer projection of the town which resembled the aftermath of Noah’s Flood – a situation that seems beyond all possibility given the history of flooding events.

Whilst we have no wish to see problems minimised, we feel that it high time to recognise that if what we are told by the powers that be is true, Boston should have a major threat of flooding lifted in the future – and that this news should be positively promulgated so that the town can show itself in a more constructive light.

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It is usually said of buses that you wait ages for one to arrive – and then three turn up together – well in Boston, this seems to be the case where Christmas is concerned this year as well.

After years which have seen us teetering on the brink where celebrations are concerned, we now have three festive events over just two days.

Boston Big Local has come up with something called a Big Thanksgiving in conjunction with Boston Stump – worryingly, the poster illustration includes a turkey!

Then, from 3pm on Thursday 27^th November, Pescod Square and Peppa Pig are holding a “Christmas lights switch-on extravaganza.”

Meanwhile, Boston Borough Council is ploughing its own furrow with “Boston’s Christmas Event” starting at 2pm in the Market Place with stage entertainment at 5pm and a light switching on ceremony at 6-30pm.

It all sounds like a recipe for Christmas consumer fatigue – and we wonder why on earth a few left hands didn’t trouble to find out what some right hands were doing!

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After all the fuss, the “publicly funded” memorial to commemorate the centenary of the outbreak of the First World War was dedicated on the 96^th anniversary of the end of the conflict.

As expected it prompted a bumper edition of the Boston Borough Council’s daily bulletin including a list of the 350 casualties of the First World War whose names appear on the memorial.

Below it were the 80 or so individuals and organisation that had given money to the appeal – listed on an effusively named “Roll of Honour.”

At the time this idea was announced, we condemned it as a naff one – and to see it in print below so many names of people who gave their most precious possession … their lives …served to underline just how insensitive an idea this was.

The dictionary defines “honour” as meaning “high respect; great esteem.”

The word is listed as synonymous with “distinction, privilege, glory, tribute, kudos, cachet, prestige, fame, renown, merit, credit, importance, illustriousness, notability.”

We know that Boston Borough Council craves recognition and awards at every turn, but how giving a few pounds to an appeal can rank the giver higher than those being commemorated beggars belief.

  

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