The re-writing of history continues with the hapless band of  non-local dissenters briefly imprisoned in Boston 13 years before the Pilgrim Fathers – none of who came from Boston either – being elevated to the sainted ranks of the first great pioneer settlers to the New World.

Starting the ball rolling was our MP Matt Warman, who really ought to know better.

In a debate on Brexit of all things, he followed the maiden speech of Plymouth MP Luke Pollard by saying: “We have a shared interest in the voyage of the Mayflower, on which I look forward to working together. I like to think of Boston as where it started. Some people would say that Plymouth was merely a stop on the way across the Atlantic …”

Almost certainly, Mr Warman will be among the VIPs invited to America in 2020 for these celebrations – so fostering and promoting these historic delusions cannot go amiss.
Which councillors will be doing to same before long, we wonder?

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Next to rally round were our local luvvies from Transported who virtually depend on their pay cheque by clinging on to the Pilgrim Fathers coat-tails.

So they were especially vocal at the last meeting of BTAC-ky – where they successfully rattled their begging bowl for £5,000 for a dog-hanging called “Pilgrim Roots” as part of the run-up to Mayflower 2020 in which Boston celebrates American Thanksgiving Day instead of Christmas.

Possibly the only sensible person in the chamber – Mayor Brian Rush – raised the not unreasonable question about what is often seen as a tenuous connection … but was banging his head against a brick wall.

Nick Jones, from Transported, said the group wanted to set up celebrations for that event as well.

“It’s not just the end of the story that’s important. We feel passionate that the most important thing is where people came from, what motivated them and what role they played.”

He said it was hoped that by taking part it would raise the profile of the town. “We are part of the whole story and we will try our best to be clear and explicit about that.”

***

Mr Warman’s wishful musings brought a prompt response from one Bostonian, who commented: “I remember very well being taught in primary school, here in Boston, that Mayflower had no connection to Boston.

“One would've thought that an MP who tries to give the impression that he has strong links to Boston would know this too?”

Hear, hear.

***

What makes this so pathetic is the way that half the businesses in the town seem to have adopted the sobriquet Mayflower or Pilgrim for no real reason – but perhaps it indicates a way forward when it comes to re-writing history and beefing up the Boston story.

For example, it’s not generally known that – due to a misunderstanding over definitions – the successful team that conquered Mount Everest in 1952 trained at Willoughby Hills, on the outskirts of Boston.

The brains behind the expedition foolishly believed that the word hill meant exactly that – and by the time the mountaineers had reached Boston it was too late to turn back and so a life-sized replica of Everest was built at Willoughby Hills from miles of 4x2 timbers draped with canvas.

And another piece of Boston’s hitherto secret history – and yet another blow for Plymouth, which seems to want to hog all the publicity – is that Sir Francis Drake was not bowling on Plymouth Hoe when the alert about the Spanish Armada was received.

In fact he was playing a game at Boston Indoor Bowls Club, more than 300 miles away, when the alarm was raised, and it took some nifty seamanship to navigate from Boston to reach Plymouth in time.

Whilst the delay played no adverse role in the subsequent battle, Drake’s ship – the Golden Hind – was renamed the Golden Behind for some years afterwards.

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Our last blog commented on the way Boston Borough Council was slapping itself on the back because other local authorities were seeking the secret of the way it doles out criminal records to beat taxpayers into obeying its demands

We cited the recent changes which make it illegal to walk your dog without carrying a back for its droppings, and parking in a way that makes life difficult for Worst Street's bin collection “freighters.”

Our remarks angered reader Alec, who e-mailed to say: “I'm a dog walker and there is nothing more frustating than stepping in dog poo; children cycle and walk in it, so stop slagging off the council for being hard on people that let dogs poo everywhere. 
“And as an ex-emergency service driver I understand the problems of the bin men having a difficult time through inconsiderate residents and motorists.

“In this namby-pamby world people don't give a toss – it’s the all right Jack brigade.

“Hammer them with fines – there again how many would pay them?

“Stop blaming the council for these cretins.”

Whilst we share some of Alec’s sentiments, the point we were seeking to make was one of criticism about an authority which whenever it encounters a problem seeks to solve it by making it illegal locally and criminalising offenders through the courts for something that would not be similarly dealt with elsewhere.

This is the very thin end of a potentially dangerous wedge – especially as we don’t regard Worst Street as the most considerate or stable judge of wrongdoing.

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Mention of our MP Matt Warman earlier reminded us that he was the subject of a recent e-mail from a new insider commentator who dubs himself The Sorcerer, and who writes:

“Isn't it remarkable to read that Matt Warman is now going to actively pursue funding for a Boston Bypass? Well I never – I can’t imagine who will have given him such an idea after years of good councillors beseeching that now political 'cast aside' Peter Bedford, to lobby his one-time boss in Lincolnshire County Council for a bypass for Boston.

“Relief, distributor road, or anything at all – even a circular country lane – would have been better than what this borough has had to endure for sixty years or so.

“But he stayed faithful to his Tory Duty, and barefacedly refused to admit there was any truth in the suspicion that we were being hog washed, and we never really needed one.

“Everybody should know by now that spouting support for a Bypass has guaranteed one Conservative after another the ticket to win a seat in Boston whether that be Borough, County, or dare I say even now … Parliament!

“But beware, and do not swallow this same old vote catching rubbish...

“Matty  has been coached no doubt by local blueys, who know that any talk of a Bypass is a vote catcher!

“However, that is all it will be; talk.

“Just look back at how many times the 'Project' has played a major part in the  political shenanigans of Boston, even before the farmers friend, RA, recruited his band of brethren to block what was considered as the best chance we might have ever had to put Boston on the map so to speak! 

“So here is the latest catch. Don't fall for it again ...but who on earth are we going to vote for this time?

“Maybe another 'Self Interest Party.’

“If so, let it not be the daft heads of UKIP again. Please, please. 

***

It was almost impossible to move last week without tripping headlong over stories about Boston’s bid to win a badge again this year in the Britain in Bloom awards.

All around the town, colourful and probably costly displays of flowers have been springing up everywhere – but only along the route which the organisers of Boston’s contribution have created for the judges to follow.

Photos from recent weeks show these plants being decanted from pots and straight into the ground to give the illusion of have been carefully nurtured there for weeks if not months.

And if last’s year is anything to go by, the poor things soon wilt and eventually disappear, having done their job of  suggesting that Boston is a riot of colour and scent throughout the spring and summer months.

Whist we welcome their brief glory, we thought that the original concept of Britain in Bloom was to highlight those communities that went the extra mile to brighten the environment for their residents – as a service, and not to win a medal to brag about..

Now it’s all about grabbing some hardware and attracting tourists, and never mind the people who live here once the judges have been and gone.

To make this even more sickening, Boston will be hosting this year's East Midlands in Bloom awards at Boston Stump on 13^th September.

We are already shuddering at the thought of the back-slapping that will ensue if once again, we win a badge.

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If you don’t believe our comments about the displays being saved for the selected few areas, if the judges had found some time to visit one of Boston’s town centre ghettoes, they would have encountered this …

This floral delight has adorned the roadside for years now.

The weeds in it are self-set – and we assume that the drinks cans are perhaps some sort of artistic installation.

Whatever, it is in one of the wards administered by BTAC-ky – which admirably underlines our criticism that the committee penalises and ignores residents in poorer areas to fund lavish showy-offy displays for the benefit of the town centre only.

Doubtless, if ever anyone works out where it is, it will disappear overnight.

***

We mentioned our First Citizen, Councillor Brian Rush earlier – and it appears that his efforts to cut down on the annual mayoral budget of £80,000 a year have been thwarted by greedy freeloaders.

Earlier this month, he staged a Meet the Mayor event at the White Hart Hotel, and decided to foot the bill from his own pocket – rather than dump it on the council taxpayers.

Attendance was subject to pre-booking – but although 45 people asked to come along, 83 turned up.

This perfectly demonstrated the ignorance and selfishness of many of the self-styled great and good of Boston, who presumably thought that turning up unannounced didn’t matter as it was only the taxpaying punters who would have to take the hit.

***

We note that the new Lidl store is developing apace, with a suggestion that it will hopefully open early next year.

You might think that rivals at nearby Tesco would be thinking of ways to get their act together to make themselves more attractive to customers in the threat of competition.

Their best effort to date a branch of Timpson’s on their site – which means that local shoppers now have three similar outlets within a few miles of each other … the other two are in the town centre.

And where has Tesco located this latest arrow in its shopping quiver?

On two of the only four disabled parking spaces closest to the store entrance!

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If you follow us on Twitter, you may have noticed that we are staging a mini war on the Boston Target for putting every story that appears on its Lincolnshire feed beneath a Boston  banner.

Roughly nine out of every ten reports so branded have nothing to do with Boston – and some come from as far afield as Nottinghamshire and Grimsby.

Every time we spot this feeble attempt to win a few extra visits to its site, we hashtag it #notabostonstory.

Many people have thanked us for saving them wasting their time, and you can tag the stories similarly if you find some that we have missed.

One its Twitter page, the Target declares “The Boston Target is your local weekly newspaper committed to breaking news, building communities and making local matter.”

Recently this has not been the case with the paper – and now it seems that any old news will do on Twitter … just so long as people click on it.

This is an insult to Boston readers which we hope will soon cease.

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Having said that, we are indebted to the Target/Lincolnshire Echo for this week’s hilarious headline which reads …

.

As many men have discovered to their cost, this sort of thing can happen if you fail to take aim carefully!

***

Finally, the general election may now be just a memory, but do you recall the tacky and somewhat contradictory stunt staged by BBC Radio Lincolnshire at its live open air public debates?

It involved a tumble dryer – the debate's “spin machine” – but as it was used simply as a post-box for written questions "spin" never entered into it.

The machine in question toured the county constituencies, looking shiny and new and presumably bought just for the purpose.

But what happened to it after that?

Recently, a contender in the TV show Robot Wars pitched up at the Lincoln studios with the machine known as Apollo which won the last series and was defending its title.

As a means of demonstrating its prowess the machine demonstrated how far it could hurl and subsequently damage a tumble dryer – which ended up looking like this.

You can see the full scene of pointless destruction by clicking here

We can only imagine that this dryer and the one touted around the election circuit were one and the same, and have to ask whether or not this was a proper way to spend TV licence payers’ money?

You can write to us at boston.eye@googlemail.com   

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Our former blog is archived at: http://bostoneyelincolnshire.blogspot.com  

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